Alone Together?

Days and days have gone by before, the same routine, the same things commonly known.  Yet, all the while one thing seems to remain.  Hoards of people moving, breathing, eating, producing, we are together, but somehow all alone.  Humanity is so LOUD, but somehow perfectly silent.

How is it?  How do individuals manage to maneuver through day to day, moment to moment simultaneously moving shoulder to shoulder with others, yet wonder, ache, astonish, contemplate, need, fear, and often succumb to hopelessness on one level or another in silence.

You may begin to dismiss it, but this is reality.  There is a paralysis setting in, an atrophy of the inner being.  This issue doesn’t only belong to the emotionally scarred.  This trap exists and ensnares those from every walk of life, successful and not, wealthy and not, brilliant and not, popular and not, outgoing and not, funny and not, athletic and not, talented and not.  To be honest, or dare I say real, it is almost impossible to walk out days on earth being truly connected… it is basically normal to venture along life’s road guarded, projecting some illusion of strength and wisdom, translate… lost trust, fear and pride.  This entire thing shows itself in preemptive acting out of human prowess.  Then we begin to believe our own lies, and trust ourselves supremely.  Then we trust whatever we tell ourselves to trust until it fails.

Who has not either experienced or observed a child whose feelings have been hurt angrily exclaiming, “I don’t care!”  Hmm, it’s plain to see that they do, isn’t it?  Unfortunately, it seems this display doesn’t stop with children.  I acknowledge my own moments of what I’ll call, ‘I don’t careness’ and admit it didn’t stop in childhood. It feels better to try to salvage any amount of strength or pride left to still wield the slightest remnant of control.  At least as a child I didn’t really have a clue what was going on within.  As adults, it’d be nice if we had grown into true wisdom and strength and walked unharmed by all the, ‘ugh’.  Looking around, it’s plain to see we are not.

Much the same as a child being swallowed up in a parents embrace, it seems our truest connecting has been relegated to physical contact.  This is so much the case that when a person refers to the concept of intimacy, one most likely assumes some sort of physical interaction.  Cheap.  It’s a momentary substitute, comforting, warming, exciting, empowering; but momentary.  However, knowing and being known, it’s a new and powerful investigation.  It brings our fears and anxieties to light and heals them with truth.  A voice from another can annihilate growing lies within. With laser precision true care-filled words, whether challenging or uplifting, obliterate the effects of an atrophied inner being.  Yet, we are captive to our instinctual avoidance of vulnerability.  Allowing another real access, it’s painful in a way that’s difficult to put into words and is usually reserved for 1 or 2 other individuals.

It’s really humanly impossible.  It requires an unbridled power and strength.  It is only supported by real love, sacrificial, beautiful life giving love.  The kind that runs into burning buildings, gives away its last dime, wears a uniform that attracts bullets, stays instead of leaves, lifts up instead of crushing down, a love that says no to oneself so that another can truly live.  It has little to do with physical intimacy.  It requires another kind.  This kind of love originates from vulnerability its intimacy is the true power of life.  It’s full of butterflies, nausea and scars.  Uncertainty battles with trust for its affection.  Real Love must exist providing the opening to vulnerability… it creates a safe place that has to be earned.

It’s simpler to do it our way, isn’t it?  Avoiding all the scary stuff… right?  Just mind your own business and do what you do…  But…

What if, your way… my way… the human way, is what leads to the mind numbing drudgery?  A perpetual pumping up of oneself at the expense of anyone nearby, so much so, it makes us mutes, cannibals even, thereby perpetuating a self reliant attitude that feeds its own cycle.  No longer looking out for their needs, no longer a longing within to know our own loved ones and now it’s a blurred existence scarcely cognoscente of an up or a down, whose left or what’s right.

What if, we are meant to love?  If ‘I love you’ was known by action not words and we all KNEW its action is our primary purpose.

What if, the person sitting next to you is your brother or sister?  If ‘need’ no longer existed, because safe places are real and love was known to be a force of power and not just cute warm fuzzy words… kittens… shiny little hearts…

Is it possible to uncage our thinking?  Is it possible we will begin to see?

WHAT IF THERE REALLY IS MORE?  MAYBE THERE IS A DIFFERENT KIND OF KINGDOM!

If we are walking around alone together we are not at all together! 

If we walk alone together we are not loving or loved, knowing or known.

If I cannot take a moment to contemplate the need of another, if in meeting another’s need I actually feed myself… What is that?

How is it that we manage to maneuver through day to day, moment to moment simultaneously moving shoulder to shoulder with others, yet wonder, ache, astonish, contemplate, need, fear, and often succumb to hopelessness on one level or another in silence?

Let’s fix it.  Start with someone you have affection for.  Ask for opened eyes so that you can really know them, make yourself known.  Begin to differentiate between loving and wanting to feel loved.  Branch out from there.  Don’t stop when you get to your church building, if you go to one.  In fact, make that your next stop.  Know the people you worship with, let them know you.  Then Love them.  Let them Love you.

Then, Do Love Together.

Pause.  Observe.  Think.  Discuss.